why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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