he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Randomize
