Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
