I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
