gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
