me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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