what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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