You can't motorboat a personality
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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