Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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