I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
