he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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