i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
My vagina is very pro this idea
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize