You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
