brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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