Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
