So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
