so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
