Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize