what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i came on her dog
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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