The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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