No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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