she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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