i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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