i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
