Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
