Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
