But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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