She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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