I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
True strength comes from lack of pants
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
