So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
