im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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