Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
