Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Randomize
