We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
