help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
