put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
