No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize