She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize