She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
that is very illegal...i love you.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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