id be glad to
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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