I looked at my own cervix.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
