would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
