We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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