I just saw a hot homeless man
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
