I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
