so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize