last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
