I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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