sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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