Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
We had to coat check the pizza.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
