I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
