Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
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