Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
