I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
